I have never blogged in my life, Sue doesn’t do blogging so I lead myself to believe. But recently I’ve been moved to put finger to keyboard, I feel the need to express myself through this medium of Twitter.
I have always had the words they are all in my head and when I speak they come tumbling out of my mouth in a verbal torrent. I just find it hard to do sitting down, stopping, I can’t think about the past , so I keep moving, keep occupying my mind. I’m in constant motion, flicking from one thought to another.
So what to blog about, random thoughts, Borderline Personality Disorder, yes I have that, but first and foremost I am Sue a person who managed and part owned a Live Music Venue and Nightclub, worked at a college training people and now am a self employed trainer for Sheffield Health and Social Care raising awareness and helping people with BPD.I am a person first a diagnosis second, it’s just a bit of me.
So why on Twitter I ask myself, my preferred platform do I call myself BPDFFS?
Hmm something about masks springs to mind, we all wear them on Twitter, we are all someone or something.
I could have chosen to be a political type, an expert, a friend, I could be anyone on Twitter, it’s a dreamworld dipping into reality. It’s where people come to be someone to be something, to gain respect, to be.
I’m here to campaign and educate about BPD and talk and share with people with my diagnosis. I read I research, I learn about social media, I fill my mind, I fill my time, so I don’t have to think… I watch people, I make friends, I laugh and I have cried. I join in chats with the professionals and wonder if they wish I wasn’t there.
I see Twitter as a place for people where we can live a life, a dream, a little sanctuary a place to be.
I have spent my time chatting with friends about a psychiatrist who on a YouTube clip told us with BPD we could be cured if we just got up in the morning. If we couldn’t wake up we should place a bucket of water over the door, that would do the trick, we gave her the hash tag #doomedfromthewomb .
I can #ff you on a Friday if I dare, but what if I left someone out? A BPD worry, not wanting people to feel abandoned or rejected.
I could live my life on Twitter, perhaps a MH Cop will save me from a S136 or I will get the social political news in the morning from a passing cow, or the Nurse With Glasses will transform MH workers to being truly wonderful with 20 Commandments, or we could beat the baddies with The care Guy and chat with the OTs about Occupation or just cup cakes. Or I’ll spend my time with my homegirls and guy, Hannah, Lisa, my two Amanda’s, Debbie and Carl, just chilling, just being supportive of one another, and all my real heroes my BPD peeps.
Imagine living in such a place, a virtual reality.
Twitter is a good place for Mental Health. It can bring hope and change for the better.
It’s whatever you want it to be for you. That’s what’s so wonderful about it.